The holidays are coming! The lights are up, festive music is playing loudly, and ads are full of big dinners and gift piles. But when money is tight, the holidays can sting, and joy can become lonely. Around the world, loneliness and money stress often appear together, especially when the holiday pressures tell us that love equals spending. Gallup’s global polling shows that people struggling to get by financially are about twice as likely to feel lonely “a lot of the day yesterday” and overall 1 in 5 of people worldwide reported feeling lonely the previous day. Additionally, an Oxford-led study across 20 European countries found almost half of people in the lowest income group felt lonely in the past week compared to the quarter of people in the highest income group with the same social activity level. In other words, low income changes how connected we feel to people, not just how often we see our loved ones. The World Health Organization now treats social connection as a public health priority because loneliness is linked to depression, heart disease, stroke, dementia, and increased risk of early death, and globally loneliness is linked to an estimated 100 deaths per hour, which is more than 871,000 deaths annually.
When loneliness hits, we may try to find comfort by scrolling social media. We see posts with coordinated holiday pjs, stacks of gifts and cash, and assume others are “doing better”. However, those “perfect” holiday moments can be edited, and may run on credit and pressure. Instead, we can focus on low-cost ways to rebuild togetherness so the holiday season feels warmer without spending more:
✳ Reach out with simple check-ins
A 10 to 15-minute phone call can do more than you think. In a 4-week study, adults aged 27 to 101 who received empathetic phone calls felt less lonely, depressed, and anxious than those who didn’t. Another study where older adults made the phone calls found that both the callers and recipients felt more connected.
✳ Move together
Going outside with someone or alone, even for a short walk, has real mental health benefits. A large review of nearly 100,000 adults found that more daily steps were linked to fewer depressive symptoms. The best part is that we don’t necessarily need a gym or fancy workout gear (unless we want to!). Walking with a loved one, or mall walking, can lift our mood.
✳ Share food
Cooking a big feast isn’t required. Potlucks, soup nights at community venues, or “bring anything” gatherings are affordable ways to make a difference. Oxford University’s Big Lunch Project found that people eating with others more often reported greater happiness, trust in others, and stronger community bonds. The study also surveyed thousands of adults and discovered that the frequency of the shared meal seemed to matter more than what was being eaten or where, and found that people who regularly shared food were more likely to help others in return. While other factors could have contributed to these results, sharing meals has little downsides and can have lots of possible benefits.
✳ Create memories instead of buying gifts
The pressure to give gifts can replace the meaning behind gift-giving. Experiences, game night, cooking, watching a movie, and other free or at-home activities tend to bring longer-lasting happiness. A Cornell University study found that people felt happier and more excited when waiting for experiences than when waiting for material gifts.
✳ Give small, give kindly
If you’re going to spend this holiday season, it doesn’t have to be a lot to matter. Even smaller acts of generosity can have a real emotional payoff. Research from Harvard Business School found that people who spent small amounts on others, like buying a loved one a coffee or donating a few dollars, felt happier than those who spent the same amount on themselves.
In a holiday season that prioritizes spending, let’s measure the holiday’s success by the moments we shared, calls we made, and meals we cooked together. Connection has no price tag, it’s what lessens loneliness and reminds us we belong.
